I have procrastinated, for more reasons than I know to explain. But the short answer is this: As I stepped into the waters of writing a study of the condition of the feminine heart and the truth of scripture, I found myself severely lacking. And even that is my own perception. The truth is, even this procrastination has stemmed from my struggle of wanting to be worthy of being chosen. I have let fear cripple me, hold me in chains, keep me from moving forward. I fear that no one will approve what I say. I fear that no one will confirm that I am a writer, that I am not wasting my time. I have led myself to a mountain of expectations that I cannot possibly climb. I expect myself to be able to speak only the truth of scripture as I look at Peter's life. I expect to move past assumptions and questions and tell you only what is true and accurate and flawless. But, I am not a scholar. I have a thousand times more questions than answers. And so, I have hidden from this series, from you because I have been afraid that I would not be able to maintain a standard worthy of being chosen.
Now, I will write about Peter, about how I see myself in him. I will not dissect the original language. I may offer more questions than answers. But, this is how we learn. Questions. If we do not ask, we will not discover.
Through the Gospels, Peter is called a few different things: Simon Bar Jonah, Simon Peter, Peter-the rock, Satan. The last one seems a bit harsh, doesn't it? So many names, one might get confused as to their true identity. Peter must have wondered who he was. "Am I silly ridiculous Simon, son of a silly little dove(I learned a while back that Jonah means silly little dove) ?" "Am I a rock, worthy of the church being built on?" "Am I working for the enemy of my Teacher?"
When Jesus first meets Simon Bar Jonah, he renames him. Before Simon speaks a word, he is given a new name and a destiny. He says to Simon, "You are Simon, the son of John. But you will be called Cephas-which translates Peter".
What strikes me most in this exchange is the timing. Jesus did not wait for Peter to obey. In fact, Jesus had not even extended the invitation (or command) to follow him. So, then, is this how it works? Before we even begin to walk with Jesus, we are given our new name? I think so. But, it's also important to recognize that Jesus wasn't giving Simon Peter this new name based on who SP was but rather on who he would become.
Let's sit with that for a while. In Christ, we have been given a new identity and destiny. And I would venture to say that most of us are not yet walking in our new name. But, it was not given to us based on who we are today. It is who we will become. It is who our Maker created us to be.
Now, I will write about Peter, about how I see myself in him. I will not dissect the original language. I may offer more questions than answers. But, this is how we learn. Questions. If we do not ask, we will not discover.
Through the Gospels, Peter is called a few different things: Simon Bar Jonah, Simon Peter, Peter-the rock, Satan. The last one seems a bit harsh, doesn't it? So many names, one might get confused as to their true identity. Peter must have wondered who he was. "Am I silly ridiculous Simon, son of a silly little dove(I learned a while back that Jonah means silly little dove) ?" "Am I a rock, worthy of the church being built on?" "Am I working for the enemy of my Teacher?"
When Jesus first meets Simon Bar Jonah, he renames him. Before Simon speaks a word, he is given a new name and a destiny. He says to Simon, "You are Simon, the son of John. But you will be called Cephas-which translates Peter".
What strikes me most in this exchange is the timing. Jesus did not wait for Peter to obey. In fact, Jesus had not even extended the invitation (or command) to follow him. So, then, is this how it works? Before we even begin to walk with Jesus, we are given our new name? I think so. But, it's also important to recognize that Jesus wasn't giving Simon Peter this new name based on who SP was but rather on who he would become.
Let's sit with that for a while. In Christ, we have been given a new identity and destiny. And I would venture to say that most of us are not yet walking in our new name. But, it was not given to us based on who we are today. It is who we will become. It is who our Maker created us to be.
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Questions for today:
1. What are the names you have been called by over the years?
2. Have you been given a glimpse of your new name? Care to share?
I would love for us to answer these questions in the comment section. If you feel like you need to, you can always comment anonymously.
Happy Journey!
Erin
Erin
